Love believes all things, hopes all things. - 1 Corinthians 13:7
I really can't just sum up everything the book says about today's task and do it justice. I highly recommend reading the book, either now, or after you have gone through this.
It basically says we have two rooms in our hearts known as the "appreciation" room and "depreciation" room. In the beginning of our relationships we probably spent all our time in the app room, dreaming about the wonder qualities our beloved had. He smells good, she listens well, he has pretty eyes, she makes me happy, etc etc. You see where this is going.
Now that you have been together some time, you may find yourself spending more time in the depreciation room than the former. Here we have ugly things written on the walls: he works too much, she is selfish, he is lazy, I maybe made a mistake. This room harbors all the weaknesses and failures of your spouse. This room is where you add up all your ammo for your next big fight. People fall out of love in this room. You must decide to stop living in this room. It will drain all of the joy out of your marriage.
You are now probably saying "But those things are true!"....yes, but so are all the wonderful things in the other room. Love chooses to live in the other room. It is aware that the other room is there, but chooses not to stay there. It believes the BEST! It gives your spouse the benefit of the doubt. The only reason you should go back into that other room is to write "covered in love" on the walls.
Your spouse is a living, breathing, endless book to be read. Dreams and hopes have yet to be realized. Talents and abilities may be discovered like hidden treasure. But the choice to explore them starts with a decision from you.
Today's dare:
Get two sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative thoughts on the second. Place them both in a secret place for another day. There is a different purpose for each sheet. Then pick one of the positive attributes from your first list, and thank your spouse for it.
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1 comment:
Ha ha. I refuse to do this. I remember Ross' list from Friends and with my luck the one day Jason actually cleans something he will find my "depreciation" list. He He
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